Caught On Tape!
by Lilana
Summary: What do the Naruto characters do in their free time? Let's find out! This is really random. Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever, own Naruto. This is just for fun.
1. Kakashi

**Kakashi: CAUGHT ON TAPE**

**Kakashi: Eat the d*** cereal, Naruto! EAT IT!Naruto: But Kakashi sensei the milk is solidKakashi: I don't f***in care if the d*** milk is solid. I got it on f***in sale. Now c'mon I don't have all f***in day to wait for you to eat your f***in cereal so I can go do the f*** d???? ******!!!%%**!!!$***%*******______________________________________________________________________________________Me: Since then we made Kakashi wear a second mask that will electrocute him whenever he curses or abuses a child. Here is a typical day since we forced...I mean...convinced him to wear the second : Hello world. The sun is warm and shining and happy and not f***in zappi*ZAP!!!!*and not painfulSasuke: Are you ok?Kakashi: What the f*** do you me*ZAP!!* mean am I ok. I'm :(thinking)hm....Well if Kakashi went insane and I'm not gonna get trained fully I guess I could join Orochimaru....maybe he's less crazy and not afraid to curse. *walks away slowly*Naruto: *walks up to Kakashi*Kakashi:(thinking)I can still get rid of my aggression by having this idiot do rigorous training methods(says)Hey Naruto I'm gonna teach you how to climb a tree using only your : Ok I get using the chakra and all but tell me again why we're starting at the top of the : Because it's better to do it at a high altitude :.....ok I'll try**


	2. Gaara

Gaara: CAUGHT ON TAPE

Gaara: *alone in room watching a chick flick* No Johnny don't leave her.*tear* She never did anything wrong*hears someone coming and switches it to wrestling*Yeah pound him into the ground Undertaker. Yeah take that Batista!Kankuro:*walks into room*Can I borrow a pen. Oh hey Wrestling can I watchGaara: *throws him a pen* No! Now go awayKankuro:*leaves room*Gaara:*turns it back to the chick flick* No Elain you have to trust him*tear*Don't give up hope*wipes eyes with tissue and blows nose**hears someone coming and switches it to football*Temari:*comes in room*Hey Gaara can I borrow-why are you crying?Gaara: I'm not crying....I'm...uh....sweating because...I'm....uh....imitating football and wrestling :*looks confused* ok just don't hurt yourself*leaves*Gaara:*calls after her* I won't*switches it back*Elain NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!*cries uncontrollably*Me: and that's how Gaara spends his weekends*watches screen*Elain !!!!!


	3. Kankuro

**Kankuro" CAUGHT ON TAPE**

**Me: *sneaks into Kankuro's room and sits an electronic parrot on his nightstand. leaves*Kankuro:*comes in* Hey where'd this bird come from?Parrot: Hey where'd this bird come fromKankuro: So now you're going to be a smart$$ huh?Parrot: So now you're going to be a smart $$ huh?Kankuro: *grows anime vain* Stop copying meParrot: Stop copying meKankuro: Shut up before I rip that beak of yours off your faceParrot: Shut up before I rip that beak of yours off your faceKankuro: My nose is not big *Gets bigger anime vain*Parrot: My nose is not bigKankuro: You don't even have a noseParrot: You don't even have a noseKankuro: I have an ideaParrot: I have an ideaTemari: *enters room*Kankuro: I'm gayParrot: Your gay.....got itTemari: Oh my god I have a gay brotherKankuro: I am not gayParrot: yes you areKankuro: Weren't you just copying meParrot: Weren't you just copying meKankuro: *gets even bigger anime vain* I hate you....AND I'M NOT GAYParrot: I hate you.....AND YES YOU ARE...you said soKankuro: *throws parrot out window*Parrot: *flies around the village telling everyone that Kankuro's gay*Temari: And here I thought you liked girlsGaara: *from his room* Elain !!!!!!!Kankuro: WTF is that about?Temari: Oh Gaara watches soaps and chick flicksKankuro: And your saying I'm the gay oneParrot: *Lands on nightstand* that's cause you are and the whole village knows you're gayKankuro: BUT I'M NOT GAYParrot: Riiight sure you aren'tMe: And that's how Kankuro ended up with a boyfriend**


	4. Neji

Neji: CAUGHT ON TAPE

Neji:*walks over to his dresser and puts on a ballerina outfit. Puts on swan lake and does ballet*Hinata:*secretly watching from the door*Wow.......Neji's gone :*jumps in air*Tutee Fruity*finishes dance and hears slow clapping*Hinata: You are really good at ballet NejiNeji: You saw nothing*pulls out one of those men in black pens*Haha you will forget.*uses pen on her and hits her with a frying pan*~5 hrs l8r~Hinata:*waking up*I just had the weirdest dream. Oh wait that wasn't a dream. Hey Neji how come you never told me you did ballet?Neji: You must forget*uses pen again*Do you remember anything that happened 5 hrs agoHinata: No*thinks* Oh yeah Naruto wanted me to tell you that you're great at : *runs out of house in his boxers and with his hair in a bun* Narutooooooooooo*holds pen out in front of him*Me: And so Neji was publicly humiliated, Hinata set up Naruto, Naruto got his memory wiped for no reason, and the toilet stole my WHOPPER. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Next time it'll be Sasuke. *laughs uncontrollably*


	5. Sasuke

**Sasuke: CAUGHT ON TAPE**

**Sasuke:*walks into living room and over to a white wall* Let's get this over with. *pulls white wall back to reveal 2 cardboard boxes* This sucks. *puts boxes at table, walks out of room, comes back in8 Oh mom! Dad! Guess what?! *sits at table* I got an A!Cardboard mom & dad:................Sasuke: *turns to cb mom* Do you love me now mom?CB mom:............Sasuke: ok then...how was work?CB mom & dad:..........Sasuke: Not too good. *silence* STOP ARGUEING!!! YOU KNOW WHAT?! I'M GAY AND I CUT MYSELF!! AND I KISSED NARUTO!!!CB dad: *turns to Sasuke* You know that's just mom: Stop cutting yourself : *runs away*Naruto and Sakura: *pop out of the cardboard boxes*Naruto: We got him : I do feel bad for him : And that's why Sasuke has issues........... ELAIN NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!**


	6. Kiba

**Kiba: CAUGHT ON TAPE**

**Me: Now we're going to spy on Kiba. What will he do? Well it technically wasn't spying. He just didn't know what a camera was.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Me: There he is.......peeing on a fire hydrant. What......the crap?Kiba: No I'm peeing. I crapped over there. *points to neighbors yard*Me: Yes but why on a fire hydrant?Kiba: Akamaru wouldn't let me out the backdoor. So I went out the front, which by the way is very hard to : Don't you have a front yard?Kiba: No I'm not done with my story yet. Well I was in the front yard....but I saw the ice cream truck.....so I chased it. but by the time I bit the bumper it was parked and the dude was yelling at me......then I saw the mailman....so I chased him....until he took out this weird bottle and sprayed it in my eyes....then I was blind...and when I could see again.......I was here. Then I saw the hydrant and remembered I had to go.....it's a good thing too cause if I would've gone on the carpet again I would be.....in the pound. And here we are. Now if you excuse me......there's a squirrel over there...that I must chase. *runs after squirrel*Little girl: Oh no! Squeekers! Run Squeekers run! Police dude that boy is chasing my : Don't worry I'll get him. *chases after Kiba*~One overly long expensive chase scene later~Dog Catcher: So you thought you could escape me forever huh? Well who's in control now. I finally caught : And that's how Kiba got adopted by this Germen Family.**


	7. Orochimaru

**Orochimaru: CAUGHT ON TAPE**

**Me: *standing in front of large screen TV* Since it is too dangerous to send a camera crew into Orochimaru's base I sent Fire. He is very stupid and annoying so even if he gets caught we win. Basically if he isn't caught we get Orochimaru's secret life on tape and we win. If he's caught and is killed....we still win. Without further adu we'll watch the feed from the camera Fire : Lord Orochimaru do we have to?Oro: If you want to become stronger than : But what does Water aerobics have to do with getting : It...uh....helps with....uh......water fighting ability something or : Well ok then. At least we're making : *whispers* Man that kid is : Did you hear something?Fire: Oh shit...I need a disguise. *disguises self as a lamp*Oro: NoSasuke: Then why does that lamp look like it's a person?Oro: I uh........don't : Why is there a lamp at the pool anyway?Oro: No more questions just get in the : Uh....ok....but shouldn't we be using a bigger pool?Oro: I said no more questions. *steps into kiddy pool* And it's cause I can't : *Steps in kiddy pool* Then why are we doing water aerobics if you can't swim? Shouldn't someone else teach me?Oro: Shut up. Nobody asked for your opinion. *gets blinded by water* Ahhh it burns. *tries to molest Sasuke and ends up molesting a doll.*Sasuke: *mutters* This is pointless. *walks away*Fire: These people are idiots and not worth spying on. I'm outta here. *leaves*Me: Well that was disturbing. Stay tuned for the next one.**


	8. Hidan

Me: And now we're going to view Hidan's secret life.~~~~~*in Hidan's room*Hidan: And now to practice my real religion. Wow this Jashin religion is a good cover-up. *carefully pulls off blade of scythe.* My real religion. *screws off part of handle of scythe* The religion..... *flips up panel. Space background in room. Hits hidden button on remaining part of scythe*........of the gedi. *scythe becomes light saber.* *sfx: voom*Itachi: *knocks on Hidan's door* Who the hell are you talking to?Hidan: No one I'm........*whispers*have to say something manly. *louder* Watching Hannah : I'm coming : No! You can't! I'm uh......: No you're : Yes I am. *uses light saber to cut off shirt* *opens door half way and peers out* : Well I'll tell you what I do see. Your pant : No you don': Yes I : Nuh uhItachi: Yuh huhHidan: Nuh uh *light saber coincidentally falls and rips his pants. Walks further out door.* : Dude those are pants. *Hidan's pants fall down* uh...: Glad you see it my way. *walks back in room. while yelling* Be glad I didn't decide to go Akatsuki: *heads pop out of rooms*Hidan: *back in own room* Well at least now I can look like a real Jedi.* sticks light saber into slot and wall panel slides away revealing a Jedi outfit.* May the force be with you! *twists light saber and room changes into starship design*~flashover~Me: *looking at screen* Man this guys a bigger loser than : *Walks in in boxers* I heard : *walks in* You're a boy?! But..but...I thought : *walks in in bikini*Oro: oh it's you I wanted. Welp I'm scarred for : *walks in. Looks at others. rips off clothes* Everybody's doing : *walks in* Why didn't you kill me off when you had the chance?! Wait! You still have a chance. Orochimaru's the bad guy. Quick Orochimaru kill me! Or wait even better! Kill the underwear : I'll kill everyone but : Then what's the point?!Oro: Did you see the mistake I made?Sakura: You mean on CAUGHT ON TAPEOro: Yeah that :*falls from ceiling*Everyone: *laughs*Naruto: Wait a minute! What's CAUGHT ON TAPE?!Everyone but me: *Stares at him* not worth it *leaves*Me: Oh you'll see. You'll : *leaves*Me: Now that we've had our daily dose of stupid....Fire: *says after he gets up* I doubled our daily doseMe: Anyway let's get back to Hidan~Back to show~Hidan: *finishes preperations* Now that all the stars are perfectly placed on the map...including the death star to that was introduced in episode...Random person: Nobody cares!Hidan: Wait! Is somebody spying on me?Random person: Yeah it's R2D2Hidan: I knew it! You're still in timeout! We were losing battery power. Thank you person with camera. By the way what are you doing man: um.........Yoda sent me to see if you are a true : Ok you can stay.~Back to me~Me: He did a bunch of othe5r nerd stuff but it's really not important.~~BTW I am not a star wars fan. If you are don't be mad be glad that we didn't bag on you more...you big dork(sorry if i insulted you) If you want to beat anybody up for that.....blame my friend.(We are not responsible for Nausia,Headache,Thewilltobeatsomeoneup,explodingcoughs,and/orNerdinvasions. Also Pokemidget will not fight ppl taller than 3 ft due to his height issues, that know any form of martial arts, have any form of weapon, or is tough enough to beat him up. But if you're under 3 ft. tall and are a dork and a wimp go right ahead. P.S. Will accept pokemon battles.)


	9. Itachi

Me: And now it's Itachi's turn.....to get made fun of by millions of adoring fans.~~~~~~~~~~~Itachi: *hanging from branch trying to sniff flower on lily pad*Sasuke: *walks over* What're you doing?Itachi: Trying to smell the pretty pink flower. OMG not a manly word to be : Well you had the word smell in : It was being used as a verb. It doesn't- hey why're you trying to burn with your heart burn : First of all it's called the atomic fireball jutsuItachi: *cough* heartburn technique *cough*Sasuke: *glares at Itachi* And second of all it was a : For what?Sasuke: For revving up my : Why do you wanna get me : Cause you're an ass!Itachi: But I'm wearing dry-clean only!Sasuke: I : But if it gets wet it'll shrinkSasuke: Not my problem....And you always cheated at checkers. *starts cuttting branch*Itachi: I swear I didn't. If you get the checker to the other side it becomes a queen and can move anywhere it wants at any time!Sasuke: That's water polo!Branch: *snaps*Sasuke: The deed is done. *walks away*Itachi: *climbs out of water after falling in* THEY'RE SHRINKING!Hidan: *walks over* What are you talking about?Itachi: MY CLOTHES ARE DRY-CLEAN ONLY!Hidan :I don't have time for this. I have to go become a true gedi in- I mean practice my : BUT THEY'RE SHRINKING!Hidan: Ok Fine I'll help. I'll cut you're shirt off with my light : Your what?Hidan: I meant to say scythe. : HELPHidan: *cuts off Itachi's shirt* Better?Itachi: My lungs are free but my pelvis isn': Dammit. *cuts off Itachi's pants.* Now are you betterHidan's voice over: I'm so glad he didn't go commando today. I'd die of embarressment if I had to go in public in just my underwear.~to me~Me: If you've been paying attention you'll see how amazing it is how everything seems to be tying : *from some random direction* Elain NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!Me: Gaara just change the channel! I'll be there in a : Squak Kankuro's gay!Kankuro: *from somewhere else* I AM NOT!~back to action~Itachi: My pelvis is free but now I can't feel my-Hidan: WHOA DON'T GO THERE! *walks away*Itachi: It hurts too much. *sfx: rip* I think i liked it better before. *grabs ripped clotheing and covers self* Thank god~To me~Me: Didn't need to see that....and neither did you. Well anyway. And that's how Itachi was publicly : Not having his room key and locking himself and having to run through the building for 2 hrs. till he found someone to unlock his room now THAT was humiliating. P.S star wars fans are still dorks.


End file.
